I lost the charger to my laptop.
You are familiar with my tendency to lose things – you’ve heard it from my columns and in person, if we’ve had the chance to meet. My sympathies always extend to other losers out there. It is extremely frustrating to not be able to find something you really need.
I really need the charger to my laptop. I am currently writing on our family’s computer, in the living room, as “Despicable Me” is showing for the 89th time. I’m not even kidding. My girls can quote it word for word. I think I might be pushed over the limit this time.
The dogs are barking at the night sky; they are within feet of me, but I can’t reach them, so I keep repeating “shhh” and writing the same line over and over again. I have been out of my ADD medicine for three days because, NEWS FLASH, I lost my prescription.
Things are not going well.
I have a headache, probably from the sudden lack of Ritalin or maybe from over exposure to Disney movies. I can’t complete a sentence. I have accidently put eggs in the freezer. I have forgotten to put clothes in the dryer, causing me to have to rewash … a shameful four times. I’ve gone to the wrong bank with a deposit. I’ve found checks that I should have already deposited, forgotten to contact the insurance company with a major change and had to pay $15 for a Redbox movie (they are only a dollar per night for those who haven’t been sucked in to the Redbox Phenomenon).
I even bought a nice birthday card for my 90-year-old aunt and forgot to take it on her birthday (for the record, I didn’t forget to go to her party). I finally got it to her a week later. I thought about mailing it but couldn’t find a stamp.
Normally, I can pull myself out of temporary lapses like this. I’m not saying I’m ever totally in what others may refer to as a “right mind” but, I usually don’t get on my own nerves. But now I am on my own nerves. I’m starting to twitch.
My children have been angels. They realize their mother is a goofball and usually don’t make a big deal about it. Lately, my 9-year-old has been reminding me to do things, like put the eggs in the regular refrigerator, not the freezer. It’s good to have her around.
I suppose these are all just “lessons in humility.” I heard the term used once by a brilliant young lady who was herself going through a rough spot. I have been learning lessons in humility a long time. You would think I know all I need to about being humbled, but I suppose there is a reason for my extended education on the subject. I try to own my flaws but not let them define me. I am certainly an advocate for the underdog, the clumsy, the forgetful. They are my kindred spirits.
My friend, Carol Ann Miracle, calls what I do “keepin’ it real.” I guess she has me pegged. How grateful I am for friends who laugh with me and not at me, at least to my face.
Tomorrow I’ll see about making a doctor appointment to get my ADD medicine and I’ll make a list of everything I really need to accomplish, hand it over to my 9-year-old personal assistant. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll find my laptop charger.
Angie Brown is a humorist who loves being a wife, mother and grandmother. She lives in Opelika with her husband of 31 years and four of their seven children.