OPINION —
Resentment is a poison that can slowly ruin your life. To harbor bitter feelings toward someone is like taking a poison and expecting the person you despise to die.
That is one of the great lessons I learned from sitting at the feet of E. Stanley Jones. When he was speaking, I felt God was speaking to my heart. He was a vigorous 77 years old when I met him, and I never tired of listening to him. He was always talking about Jesus because “Jesus is Lord.”
“The human body is made for good will, not for ill will,” he said. He told of clinical experiments which showed that when anger sets in, it interrupts the process of digestion.
In one study of a group of people with ulcerative colitis, 85% of the patients admitted they had resentments — against parents, employers or colleagues.
When someone irritates us, we are apt to say, “That person makes me sick.” There is a lot of truth in that comment. People can make us sick — if we react with resentment to their behavior. Resentment causes the stomach to secrete acid.
One woman lived with her daughter and son-in-law for five years under great tension. The daughter developed arthritis and her husband had a stomach ulcer. But when the mother moved out, both got well.
Anger distorts one’s vision. It is literally true that a person can make you so mad that “you can’t see straight.” So it might be wise to find a “designated driver” for folks who are angry and resentful.
When we allow people to “get under our skin,” we may sometimes break out in a rash. That is because life will work in only one way — the way of Jesus, the way of kindness and love. When we break the law of love, our inner conflicts and turmoil cause the body to malfunction. It is like the body is saying, “I don’t like what is going on inside me.” The rash, or some other ailment, may be the body’s way of saying, “Please get rid of your resentment so I can function normally.”
Resentments are often buried in the subconscious mind. Jones told of a banker who insisted that his wife would never have her name in the newspaper’s society section. She resented his demand and soon became an invalid. Her husband spent a fortune on medical treatments, but she remained dysfunctional. When her husband died, she got well. No longer resentful, she was no longer an invalid. But both of them had paid dearly for their unhealthy attitudes.
There are laws which must be obeyed if we are to live well. Life will simply not work correctly if we allow resentments to smolder inside us. Boiling resentments are sometimes the cause of murder or suicide. Forgiveness can break the stranglehold of resentment, allowing bitterness to give way to peace. The practice of forgiving others is a law of the Kingdom of God. Forgiveness is the way of Jesus and life will work in only one way — His way.
Good will is good food — for the body and the soul. Resentment is a deadly poison. Fortunately, there is a solution. We can turn to Jesus and with his help refuse to allow resentments to take up residence in our hearts. To refuse to do so is like spitting against the wind.
