I was talking to a dear friend the other day who was telling me about a woman she knows who made a snide remark about my friend’s husband … I loved the way she was shocked at the woman’s words and quite frankly wanted to go for her throat.
Being the dignified Christian that my friend is she “just let it go” and vented to me … which I believe shows immense wisdom with the exception of me writing about it (of course I would never divulge sources). The woman wanted to get my friend into a conversation bashing her husband. My friend was having none of that. Good for her, and him.
Who of us is perfect? Why should we hold our husbands to a higher standard than we want to be judged ourselves?
I was 22 when MB and I tied the knot. Yes — we were in the world’s eyes -— too young. We had nothing. We started our married life as college students with $3 between us, but we were wealthy beyond imagination.
If I had started compiling a list of things that “bugged” me about him then we wouldn’t have lasted a year. To be fair, if he had done the same it would have lasted only a few months. I didn’t see his flaws, or maybe I did, either way it didn’t matter, I had every reason to believe he was my prince charming and that is exactly how he’s turned out.
So, here’s what I want to say … he snores. That’s right, every night I listen to it for a few minutes thinking I can block it out, then I can’t.
I shake him and ask him to turn over … he does and I can usually get to sleep because it’s no longer in my ear. I started thinking about the fact that he snores, and you know if I wanted to start my list now I could. He leaves his dirty clothes on the bathroom floor, the nerve of this guy. I guess he means for me to pick them up. He also leaves his racquetball bag at the foot of the bed, sometimes in my middle of my night ventures to the bathroom I trip over it. I’ve considered waking him up and telling him he nearly broke my neck. Let’s face it, he can be a real pain. He slurps his coffee, watches all sports and ignores the kids fighting, but, what would I be without him?
I would not for one instant want to know. Because in spite of any little inconvenience or frustration he ever causes, I love him.
He listens to God. He laughs at me. He makes me laugh. He is always the first to say he’s sorry when we have a disagreement. He picks me daffodils every Valentines Day. He brings me Snickers when he stops for gas, he loves them too but chocolate gives him headaches so this is a double sacrifice. He hangs up his towel. He doesn’t mind doing the grocery shopping. He lets me choose the movie. He tells me I’m beautiful. He makes us all pancakes on Saturdays. He appreciates little things I do for him (and lets me know it).
He is an awesome example for our boys. He helps with homework. He gives even when he doesn’t have anything left. He doesn’t complain about my housework or not having clean socks. He doesn’t complain about anything.
He is still quite the athlete. (If you don’t believe me, play racquetball with him.) He has more patience than ANY man I have ever known. … he has lived with four A.D.D. family members without even a threat to harm any of us. He always puts his change in the vacation jar.
He turns off lights all over the house every night. He reads all my stuff and is usually very complimentary. He gives good hugs and even better kisses.
He can fix anything. He can see something and build it. He steps in and says, “I’ll get this” when he sees me struggling with something. He makes us all feel safe. He is not only my prince, but the king at the end of the day when he walks through the door.
He is as solid as an oak, steady as the sun. He never gets in a hurry about anything. He is trustworthy, fair, thoughtful and honest. He is really good at Scrabble. He is creative and smart. He never compared any of my cooking to his mother’s.
He is, hands down, the best friend I ever had and I have some pretty good ones. He has been my counselor/therapist countless times, couldn’t have afforded him if he hadn’t been in the family. He never takes credit for all the good he does.
These are not reasons I love him. That’s an altogether more complicated matter, but I do love these things about him and find much more satisfaction in listing them than coming up with flaws.
So, he snores …
He also has kept me warm at night for 29 winters, so I’m thinking I’ll buy some earplugs and be happy with the gift he is to me.