Cloudy days

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I have been mulling over what it is I want to say to you. I am grateful for the opportunity to have this little (unfortunately one sided) conversation with you all each week.

I appreciate your comments and I love knowing you personally. I try to entertain, I want to make you smile and hopefully even chuckle sometimes. I don’t share opinions on politics or social issues very often. I trust God with the major stuff, and the minor stuff. Most of my life revolves around lots of minor stuff.

Lately I have noticed a cloud following me around. It’s not just me, it seems to have attached itself to many of the people I love. Maybe it’s age, maybe it’s that stage we girls get stuck in when the hormones get all mixed up. I certainly am at that age. Maybe it’s chemistry. I am certainly not opposed to medication to lift the cloud, but sometimes it doesn’t do the job.

Some of us are discontent with where we are in life. There have been disappointments, unfulfilled dreams, tragedies and heartbreaks. I talked to a friend the other day who feels 30 plus years married to the same man has been a vain attempt at happiness. He is a good husband, she is a good wife, they are just bored. It shocked me and broke my heart to hear her words. But, they are not alone.

I suppose most of our struggles are flaws in perspective. We wallow in self doubt.

We wonder about what might have been. We get so busy living the life we have set before us we forget to dream or play. We forget how to be young and joyful.

Sometimes we think our happiness is dependent on others. We can’t put that kind on pressure on anyone. We shouldn’t have spouses with the expressed purpose of making us happy. God forbid we have children for that reason. We have to learn to be content where we are with what we have.

It is easy to take each other for granted. I am reminded often that I could have lost my beloved years ago to an accident that blinded him in one eye. It was a turning point in my love for him. Maybe we should consider the people who are sitting beside their spouse at the hospital or hospice center.

We are not going to live forever, you know. Kind of puts things in a different perspective if you think your life has become less than a daring adventure.

I do know this, if you try to please everyone you will end up pleasing no one. Seek to please God. Do what you can to make someone else’s burden lighter. Make yourself laugh, others will join in. Seek out the friends who understand and listen and do the same for them.

The cloud over my head is more a result of being worn out than being bored. When life is too full it’s taxing on the mind and spirit as well as the body. I know what I need to do.

I will pray, eat healthy food, sleep, laugh and get out and play. I will appreciate all I have. I will take my medication and be thankful for all the people who are there for me when I need help.

Life is good.

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